THIS person THAT person

I have always been outgoing, happy, loving, active person until I found out about my tumor. I let my headaches get the best of me because I knew they weren't just headaches anymore. I let them open my brain so that I wouldn't take the chance of having seizures or continued pain in my head. I wanted to be back to my active happy loving self but instead I'm THIS PERSON! I'm selfish I'm tired I'm cranky as my head hurts to the point where some days I can't even make it out of bed (rare but reality) THIS is the person I never wanted to be. At work we read everyday about people using pain as an excuse just to get money or pain meds and attention. Sometimes I feel like maybe this is what's really happened to me ...until I get that very real very raw pain in my head where I can't get up and if I want to u have to turn to the medicine. I want to be THAT person I used to be where I never let anyone or anything stop me again. But until a doctor addresses my problem and actually wants to help besides telling me this is normal. THIS Is the new me that I dislike and will try everyday to overcome.